As much as many adore the girl child for their natural soft spokenness, gentility and mostly, beauty which defines their feminity, it is ironical that it's with such passion that the idea seems repulsive to some.
Or what could be the explanation to the Child-Bride stunt being pulled by the Nigerian senate?
I am sure this leaves you with a nagging question "why"?
It is of no doubt that the proposed amendment of the said section is hugely targeted at making the girl child more vulnerable as they already are...an example is that of Yerima's controversial marriage to an Egyptian girl-child.
Without much ado, here is my honest appraisal how best to raise the girl child and what can be done to protect them from predatory claws.
I do not belong to any school that believes raising a female child is more complicated than raising a male child or that the male child is superior to their female counterparts which society often succinctly define as the 'lesser' sex.
In Nigeria today, many people are apt to the idea of having males as children as against the opposite sex. This can be largely related to the dehumanising ways females are treated in the world.
Recently, cases of violence and serial rape cases against women happened in countries such as India and prominently Nigeria is no stranger to such criminal atrocities. Also the perception that the male child is superior disregards the importance of the female child.
Unfortunately for some, their search for the revered male child usually inadvertently ends up with them having many children (all females) that they can't cater for comfortably and adequately. If luck would have it, he could have a male or continue trying. In West Africa, especially the yoruba speaking tribe, such male children are revered. Special names like (OKANLAWON or AROLE) which are typical indigenous yoruba names are given to such "fortunate" male children.
Once their dream have been realised, they forget the care and responsibilities they ought to be there for, for the female children and therefore concentrate only on the male child.
Hence, inadequacies set in and the female child is left to suffer the lack of parental and most often, paternal care. Their needs are neglected, their cries are left unresponded to and their aspirations are killed.
It therefore leaves many to the imagination the problems of taking care of female children in this era of economic melt down without them falling prey to Unwanted pregnancy, Prostitution, Child traffickers amongst others? Then, I thought again, why do majority feel that male children are better?
Research into it shows that the alarming rate of prostitution in Nigeria has gone beyond control as the tertiary institutions in Nigeria have become producers of prostitutes.
Recently, the deputy senate president suggested the legalisation of prostitution in Nigeria which leaves questions to the sanity of the country's legislative and entire governing system.
What is legal about selling sex for money or other unstated problems?
It's no longer news that lecturers harass female students sexually, students lewdly patronising lecturers for marks or high-ranking government officers and dignitaries patronising brothels. But must this derogatory act be legalised?
Well, as a yoruba proverb goes, "ile ni ati n ko eso re ode" translating that charity, they say begins at home.
I feel if the abuse should be reduced it has to start from the parents, most especially the 'I am busy making money' fathers. Adequate paternal care creates an emotional and solid base for a girl child to learn to interact with issues regarding her feminity when dealing with events that could lead sexual abuse or otherwise.
Also keeping a girl upright must not always follow the "spare the rod, spoil the child" line.
Many effective corrective methods can be applied instead of using the whip such as counselling and incentives for good attitude. Irrepressible usage of the rod could cummulatively lead to insolent behaviour which is negative to the required effect intended by using the 'iron' hand.
Recently, while conversing with a female friend, she revealed to me that her dad has never used the rod on her.
Instead whenever she goes wrong, he creates time for her, he sit her down and talk to her in a manner that would make her remorseful, then he would also cite real- life examples to make her understand more. Isn't that amazing?
They play a lot, he taught her majority of all she knows and anytime she has done wrong, he repeats the pattern. However how true the bible said "spare the rod and spoil the child".
Even the holy books made reference to the power of the tongue as a healing device and as a destructive member.
In addition, I believe all the girl child needs is time.
If parents can try as much as possible to spend more time with their children, relate with them and teach them all they need to know before they encounter it. when a child gets to the puberty stage teach them sex education and how to
behave in certain situations.
Just make sure communication between you and you children don't stop and I bet you,you would be proud of them. #justthinking#
Wande Coal may be on his way to becoming one of the many artists who have decided to call it quits with their debut record labels. Starting from D Koko master, Dbanj to young superstar, Wizkid and others, rumour mills have it that the dark-skinned sonorous musician could actually be on his way out of Mavin Records.
